Intergalactic Space and Baked Beans on Toast. by Winthrop Murray
31 March 2021 { Science fiction }
In the beginning, space was amorphous with the ‘God energy’ at its centre. This power grew exponentially until it could be contained no longer. There were great explosions and eruptions which initiated life in all its forms. These infinite exothermic reactions resulted in the planets and the stars and the release of all positive and negative life forces. It is here that the Soul Guardians or ‘Herraff’ were created, they were born of the space in between.
The Herraff roamed through time and space, hovering over the earth and travelling on the mists of time, their role was to silently observe all ‘soul journeys’ ...and learn.
Castle Street, in Edgeley is just an ordinary shopping precinct in the outskirts of Manchester. Next to the post office there's a shopfront, with blue painted window frames and images of waves and boats etched on to the pane. The Sea Breeze Café is a popular meeting place, inside it’s usually busy with people eating and drinking among the maritime paraphernalia, a little odd since the café is nearly 40 miles from the sea.
Invisible to the human eye, a single Herraff hovered high up in a rather greasy and dusty corner, just above a shelf displaying a model sailing boat and a wooden seagull with one leg. The café was opened in 1998 and has had 2 owners since then, but due to the public’s fondness for it, both owners had kept the name and décor just the same.
Nobody could know why the Heraff chose this place but here it was. Completely invisible to human eyes except for the occasional psychic or ‘enlightened one’ who may see a shimmer of light in their peripheral vision. It was here simply to observe.
It was watching as Derek Malone stumbled through the door, hunched over shoulders and a nervous ‘don’t look at me’ expression on his bespectacled face. A large skinny, fury creature hung round his neck, this was a ‘Grimka’, another side product of the Big Bang. A minor soul creature living in various dimensions and represented the egoic pain body, the very essence of human existence. The Grimka comprised a faint mass of swirling vapours, occasionally coalescing into a slothlike face or a long etiolated limb. Nobody could ever see a Grimka, not even the enlightened.
Derek spotted the only clean table and sat down, it was set for six. All the others seemed to be half cleared, had boxes and cleaning products on them or simply hadn’t been wiped since the previous incumbents. The owner sauntered over, Derek smiled a weak smile.
“You can sit there for now, but if it gets busy with the lunch rush you’ll have to sit on a single table over there!” the owner said brusquely.
Derek nodded,
“That’s fine.”
He moved to pick up the menu, as he did so the nebulous creature draped round his neck coalesced, reached out a long scrawny limb and knocked over the cruet set, smirking in an unpleasant way.
“Oops, sorry” said Derek
“You pay for any breakages” said the ‘friendly’ waiter, not sure if he was joking.
Derek carefully read the lunch menu but decided to just have a cappuccino and a piece of carrot cake. He kept trying to attract the owner’s attention but he was bent over the counter, engrossed in a Golf magazine. Derek got up to walk over to the counter. Grimka dragged the heavy chair along the floor so it made a loud scraping sound then swung it out in front of Derek so he stumbled, again the creature sniggered.
Derek ordered at the counter, paid, and sat down again. He was quietly enjoying his cappuccino when the creature nudged his arm and a large wave of hot coffee spilled over his hand and on to the table. He mopped it up with a paper serviette. Derek glanced up at the waiter, he was observing from behind the counter, busy polishing the cutlery and slowly shaking his head.
At least he managed to eat the carrot cake with no further problems. Despite there being no sign of the lunchtime rush Derek didn’t feel particularly welcome so he stood up to leave; again Grimka scraped the chair, and rattled the wall lights. The waiter looked up.
Derek’s life philosophy had always been ‘the ruder people are to you the nicer you should be to them’ a sort of game he played to try and shame grumpy people into pleasantness.
He took his empty plate and cup to the counter, smiled and said
“Thank you that was really good carrot cake”
He dropped a pound coin in the glass tip jar by the till and said a cheery,
“Thanks, Goodbye”
“Goodbye” came the response and what seemed like a genuine smile.
Herraff stirred, floated down from its space in the high corner, and followed Derek across the room. Apparently its observations were to continue... away from the café.
Derek pushed at the door, Grimka held the door closed, he tried pulling the door, nothing. He tried pushing the door again only much harder, Grimka let go and Derek stumbled out on to the pavement, ending up on his hands and knees. The hanging bell above the door jangled for some time. Grimka smirked.
Derek walked along a row of old fashioned shops, gazing into the widows he stopped at the last one, the cobblers. There was a thin fence panel at the end of the shop, he reached over the top and felt for a small metal plate. Grimka scratched at him with its sharp talons; Derek yanked his arm back and winced, sucking his finger to soak up a tiny bit of blood,
“Stupid catch”
He shook his hand in an attempt to somehow flick off the pain. Derek opened the disguised wooden gate and walked into a small hidden garden, there was a short gravel path leading to his ground floor flat which was joined to the back of the shop. He opened the door and went inside.
He always kept his house nice and tidy but it was usually damp and every wall was crying out for a fresh coat of paint. He turned the gas fire on and went into the kitchen to make tea. He'd had quite a substantial lunch at work, as there’d been a big meeting and a buffet was included. So Derek just fancied a light meal tonight.
In his kitchen he quickly made some toast, heated up the beans, put them on a plate and then on to his padded tray. There was nowhere to eat in the house so he always ate on the settee, usually watching TV. The gas fire had done the trick and it was now nice and cosy. Putting the tray on the armchair by the door, he leant forward and turned on the TV. Seeing a news item about the company he worked for and not wanting to miss anything he slowly backed away to the settee behind him. He felt the cushions behind his calves and started to sit down watching the screen intently, Grimka grabbed the tray of food from the chair and dragged it across to the settee behind him. Derek sat on his beans on toast.
He jumped up immediately as if scolded
“Noooo!” he shouted, “Oh flippin ‘eck”
Beans flew everywhere so he straddled back over the tray in an attempt to keep the bulk of the food contained and ‘crab walked’ into the kitchen. He dumped the tray in the sink, took off his trousers and sponged and scraped the worst off into the pedal bin. Derek went upstairs in his underpants to get another pair of trousers and drop the wet trousers into the washing basket. Shortly afterwards he came down and went through the whole rigmarole again, only this time he didn’t sit on his food and finished off with half a tin of rice pudding. He watched a couple of programs but his TV kept losing the signal, Grimka was busy again unplugging and swapping the cables. Eventually Derek just gave up and sat in silence, feeling a little sorry for himself.
He worried about all the problems at work but then he remembered sitting on the baked beans and started to smile. His mood lightened and he began to laugh to himself, his shoulders going up and down. The Grimka placed its hands on his moving shoulders and pushed and pulled them up and down, exaggerating the movement, his laughter got a little louder and faster and then a bit manic, until it finally turned into sobs. He put his head in his hands and the sobs turned into great heaves of crying, as despair overtook him
“Why does nothing ever go right for me?”
Grimka danced around and clapped its hands.
Herraff floated off into the night sky back to its base in the café, it had observed enough today.
Next morning Derek was in the office early, there was a large divisional meeting at 11am and staff had come up from Head Office. Herraff was already hovering in the top corner of the meeting room. There were 20 delegates, and four speakers, Derek was the first. He’d prepared well and really knew his stuff after almost twenty years in the same job. He stood up to introduce himself. Grimka yanked the microphone lead and it stopped working, somehow it wasn’t plugged back in correctly and there was some feedback. Eventually the electronic noise faded and Derek spoke, although his voice seemed rather quiet, Grimka had its claws round his neck and was scratching his Adam’s apple making him cough and stutter over his words. People seemed bored and gazed out of the window, only glancing at the screen to view the PowerPoint display which, thanks to Grimka, seemed to be either upside down or out of sync. Derek eventually finished and sat down, as he did so a glass was sent flying off the table. One of the PAs, Julie, picked up the glass and mopped up most of the water, she smiled at Derek, and put her hand reassuringly on his shoulder. Grimka eyed her and frowned.
As the next speaker began to set up, one of the delegates leaned over to the manager in charge of the meeting and whispered “I don’t think his mic was on, none of us could hear him."
“Yes, I noticed too late, I think I forgot to turn it on for him, never mind, it’s only Derek.”
They both smiled.
The next speaker went down much better, and then the third was all set up but didn’t appear to be there.
“Does anyone know where John is?” said the team leader
“Yes he’s gone to the loo.”
“Must be nerves,” someone whispered, there was a murmur of stifled sniggers.
Eventually John came in, apologised and started his presentation. He was full of confidence and energy and spoke fast but with passion and apparent knowledge, they were all impressed with the way he carried himself, especially for one so young. Everything went smoothly, the only negative was his annoying habit of sniffing after each sentence, but only Derek seemed to notice.
One of the senior delegates leaned over to the team leader and whispered, “He’s very impressive; I don’t think we need look any further for our new project manager?”
Only Derek knew enough about the job to realise that most of John’s figures didn’t add up and some of his suggestions had been tried before but had failed spectacularly. Obviously he wouldn’t mention it during the meeting, John was only young and Derek didn’t want to stifle his enthusiasm.
Only the Herraff knew the truth. It understood that if Derek’s proposals had been taken on board they would have worked well. However it also knew the project was going to be handed to John and six months down the line, with no progress and much staff backbiting, the project would be quietly dropped. John would be promoted overseas in an attempt to avoid a financial and personal scandal.
But Herraff was here only to observe.
The delegates left, Derek stayed behind to tidy up. Only one other person stayed to help him, Julie. She had listened intently to Derek’s talk and had understood some of his ideas, she was really impressed and told him so. They made an efficient cleaning up team and in no time they’d washed all the cups and plates, put away the spare paper and pens, and put all the food in the kitchen.
Several times Julie moved close to Derek and Grimka had hissed or growled. It tried several times to smash a glass or make Derek drop something but each time Julie seemed to be there before it, she’d pick up the glass or steady the tray; the creature was frustrated and seemed a little afraid of her.
They chatted for a while and both said they were getting a little hungry, so Julie asked Derek if he’d like to grab an evening meal somewhere, he said “yes” and suggested the Sea Breeze Café, as it wasn’t too far away.
In the café Julie and Derek hit it off, they talked and laughed late into the evening, there were no accidents. Grimka seemed to be fading away.
This was the first of many evening meals in the café. They soon grew fond of each other and their conversation flowed so easily, they really seemed to get each other's sense of humour. Derek smartened himself up, Grimka seemed to be finding it hard to hold on to Derek, it kept losing its grip round his neck and falling to the floor.
One night Julie and Derek were enjoying a romantic meal; there was a candle in the middle of the table. Grimka saw its chance to knock the candle over and hopefully burn Julie or set fire to the tablecloth. It reached towards the centre of the table but just in time Julie picked up the candle and smiled lovingly at Derek in the flickering light. Grimka let out an almighty screech of frustration, it yowled and screamed and stamped until, eventually, understanding it had finally been beaten, it started to cry, such heart wrenching sobs.
At this moment Derek leaned over and kissed Julie for the first time, she blushed, held his hand and kissed him back.
This was the final straw, Grimka gave in. It slowly unravelled itself from Derek’s body and began to float upwards, fading away to nothing as it rose, there was a final little red spark as it disappeared forever.
Herraff realised it had learned all it could and floated away, back to the café.
Derek and Julie looked into each others eyes, they couldn’t believe their luck, they’d finally found each other…soul mates!
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